Everything I do in my life is to make others happy: Mum, Dad, Husband, Kids, Boss...
the list is endless. Only problem is that I am not happy.
Let me give you more details - my parents are very strict and traditional and have very high expectations, so I do my best not to disappoint. I do everything they ask of me - behaviour, manners, education, appearance, etc. I still do even though I am a grown woman with my own kids now. I always have to take into consideration how they will react to something, or how they would want me to deal with situations.
I even married someone they had setup for me and did not have any real relationship experience before that.
But over the last couple of years I have grown up alot, and what I want from life has changed. I am beginning to realise that I want to do things that my family and my husband may not necessarily approve of.
But I'm worried I will upset them. Every time I think of myself and what I want, I feel guilty.I've tried going behind their backs but it is so hard to keep the secrets. So many lies and having to be extra careful what I say and where I go in case someone sees me. I shouldn't have to lie to keep them happy. and I don't like lying.
How do I get out of this vicious cycle?
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